Walked into a doorknob again...

D: That's quite a black eye.
Me: I know.
D:  Your arms are covered in bruises, too.
Me:  The Toddler keeps kicking the crap out of me.
Me again:  (yawning), man, why am I so tired all the time?
D:  Maybe it's cancer.
Me:  Probably.  Then I'll die and you'll have to raise these three kids all by yourself.
D:  No, it's not that kind of cancer.  It's just the kind where all your hair falls out but you still live.
Me:  Is it at least the kind of cancer where you lose weight?
D:  No.  You'll just have to have your asshole removed or something.