D: What is that on your neck?
Peanut: It's marker.
Me: From two days ago.
D: Come on. Go wash it off.
Peanut: Won't come off. It's sharpie.
Me: It will come off if you wash it a few times.
Peanut: Fine. I'll just wash it off with hand sanitizer.
Me: You can't wash it with......(pause, as the lightbulb goes off in my head)......NO! That's not hand sanitizer. I mean, it's, that's, just, no. No.
Me: He was going to wash his neck with this "hand sanitizer."