Me: What is that smell? Something smells like poop in here.
Moon: I dunno. I don't really smell anything.
Me: Come here. Let me smell you. When is the last time you showered?
Moon: Last night.
Me: You did not.
Moon: I mean the night before that.
Me: No you didn't. We got home late and you went to bed.
Moon: Well, it was definitely the day before that.
Me: That's gross. You need to start bathing or you're going to be the stinky kid.
Me: Do you think you're going to like girls someday?
Moon: Mo-o-om...I don't know.
Me: Well, girls don't like boys with bad hygiene. Start bathing. Stinky.
Moon: Mom, when I start liking girls I'll worry about showering. But that day is not today.